At Training Camp they tell you that The World Race will wreck you.

There's a link on every one of our blogs to a website called Wrecked For The Ordinary.

I have squadmates moving to Thailand, Peru, Bolivia, Mozambique, and Swaziland.

And then there's me. Moving back to New Jersey, and then to my college town.

I thought I'd be so wrecked that I'd never want to touch a computer or car again, that I'd never want a house, and that I'd be some hippie missionary running the streets barefoot in Bangladesh with orphans.

Lately, to be honest, I've wondered if God has really wrecked me.

Because the reality is, what I feel called to do requires that car, computer, and decent home. I will always be involved overseas, but my life, at least in the foreseeable future, will be in University aged America, not dirt roads in obscure countries.

Sure didn't see that one coming.

But this week, God has showed up. I think He was trying to talk to me, and I just wasn't listening. I was too busy being gloomy about how I don't even know if I've changed this year. This could have easily been said to me at any point earlier this week:

(attractive, Stephanie, real attractive.)

Anyway, as many of you know, He knocked me on my butt so that He could get some alone time with me. I was supposed to spend my last four days of ministry on the Race living at a camp with a couple hundred kids, doing dramas, teaching Scripture and getting zero sleep. But on the first day there, I took a really hard fall, and ended up in the hospital. While my elbow is not fractured, until today I couldn't move it at all, and now I can move it just enough to type this blog (praise God.) But I've spent two days now, in bed, resting my arm on a pillow, with nothing to do but hang out with Jesus (and the occasional Skype call or movie). And honestly? It's been such a blessing.

Because God has showed me that He HAS wrecked me. Instead of me ministering to a bunch of kids, God ministered to me.

He's wrecked my expectations for myself. See: Grace for the Good Girl.

He's wrecked me from believing I could control my own life.

He's wrecked me from ordinary, meaningless, non life-speaking friendships.

He's wrecked my romanticized dreams of living overseas.

He's wrecked me for over-churched, over-theologized, Bible college kids, who need more Jesus in their lives.

He's wrecked my idea that I could be that Jesus to them without full reliance on Him.

He's wrecked my self-righteous attitude towards Christians and the church, and given me the desire to show "grace upon grace."

He's wrecked me for my family.

He's wrecked me for my home church.

He's wrecked me for the Jersey Shore.

He's wrecked me for Philadelphia.

He's wrecked me for Eastern Pennsylvania.

He's wrecked me for the women in my life. My sisters.

He has wrecked me for the ordinary. Because even if on the outside, God has called me to a more "ordinary" lifestyle than African orphanages and Bangladeshi dirt roads, I will not allow my life to be ordinary. Or mundane. Or the way it used to be.

I'm free from fear. From people pleasing. From Satan's lies.

I've been wrecked for freedom.

I've been wrecked for God's will for my life over my own.

I've been wrecked for the ordinary.

If you want to find out more about the super cool ministry God has put on my heart for the next season of my life, or want to partner with me in it, I'd love to have a coffee date upon my return. I am so excited about what He's up to.

To read the Wrecked For The Ordinary Manifesto, written by Jeff Goins, click here:

http://changethis.com/manifesto/download/68.04.MisfitManifesto